I really hate diabetes.

I’ve been insulin dependent for almost a year. Most days I manage it. Other days, it manages me.

I had a wonderful dinner last night with my spouse, protein heavy, and carb intake reasonable. My blood sugar was low before dinner, and I bolused the appropriate amount of insulin for dinner. I came home, and my blood sugar was fine.

Then it took a dive. I corrected with a handful of cherries and a little chocolate. I wanted to go to bed, but it was time to change my insulin pump, so I did.

My blood sugar started going up to what looked to be a normal range, in the 120’s, so I went to sleep.

Not for long.

My blood sugar started to climb. And climb. My Dexcom continuous glucose monitor was alarming every five minutes, alerting me of my high blood sugar. I left my bedroom, not wanting to disturb my spouse with the alarms.

Frustrated, I started pounding down Gatorade Zero. I kept correcting my blood sugar with insulin. My blood sugar kept climbing.

Once it got to 300, I said uncle, and pulled out my newly placed pump. Although there was no indication it wasn’t working, I was hoping that the pump was the problem.

It was.

My blood sugar is below 300 and steadily dropping. It’s 0318 and I’m still drinking Gatorade Zero. I won’t be able to rest until my blood sugar stabilizes.

It will probably be daylight before that happens.

To think, just over a year ago, I was a misdiagnosed type 2 diabetic, with minimal pancreatic function. But it had function. I could eat, exercise, sleep, and live without diabetes being constantly in the forefront of my mind.

Those days are long gone.

While I am grateful for the technology that helps me manage my type 1 diabetes, this disease sucks.

It really sucks.