I am not Susie Homemaker.

Many things have contributed to this.

When I was young, I was cooking as soon as I could reach the stove. By the time I was a freshman in high school, I was responsible for cleaning the house, and cooking when my mom was at work.

Rebelliously, I refused to clean MY room. It was the only place I was in control.

Rebellion was strong with the younger me. I was a single mom, working 2-3 jobs, and keeping the house clean was on the list – below spending time with the kids, making sure they were fed, and trying to get some sleep.

The house sometimes looked “lived in”. Usually looked worse.

I’ve worked since I was 16. I never got into a rhythm of cleaning.

I have raging ADHD, and it’s all about systems for me. Making lists. Checking things off.

It’s easy for me to get overwhelmed when there is a lot to do.

No one took the time to show me how to keep a home.

I didn’t have time.

Interestingly enough, all I wanted to be when I grew up was a housewife and mother.

Now, in the last quarter of my life, it is being realized.

It’s not easy to start something new at this age.

I know how to work hard – I’ve done it for decades.

Now I am slowly coming up with a system that works for me.

Little by little, there is a deep cleaning happening in this big house.

I’m learning to slow down. It’s a fight. My body threw up the white flag, and I have to listen.

So I will.

I am a full time housewife.

Finally.